[Jewish] [Mindful Torah] Psalm for Wednesday: Psalm 94, verse 2

[Rabbi Steven Nathan]

Rise up, O Judge of the earth; pay back to the proud what they deserve

This psalm is definitely the most challenging for me. The images are
strong and often violent. So I'm interested in seeing what arises
within me as I sit with each verse.

Pride is something with which I have a real love/hate relationship. I
am proud of my accomplishments in life, and yet I know that pride can
easily lead to hubris. In Christianity, pride is one of the seven
deadly sins. Judaism doesn't go quite that far. But our tradition does
give warning to those who might become too proud. This verse is a case
in point.

As I have taken to writing, teaching and performing more, I have
struggled with the issue of "promoting myself." It has always felt a
bit haughty and certainly not modest. And yet I know that I have
something to teach and to offer others. I wouldn't be writing this blog
if I didn't.

The turning point that allowed me to feel more comfortable was the
moment when I realized that my talents were from God. I often feel that
the words I right do not come from me, but flow through me from some
other source. This is especially true when writing poetry. Being
mindful allows me to recognize and acknowledge this. And it enables me
to promote myself and be proud in myself, because I realize that it is
the Divine energy that flows through me which is the source of my
creativity.

But the proud of which this psalm speaks, I believe, is the pride of
hubris. Believing that I am the source of everything that comes from
me. It is a pride born of ego and not of humility or a connection with
divinity. When people exhibit this kind of pride, it is almost certain
that at sometime they will "get what they deserve."

This phrase usually connotes punishment. But I'd like to turn it on its
head and believe that "what the deserve" is to be hit over the head
with the realization that it's not about them. It's not about ego. It's
about being in partnership with the Divine. Bringing the Divine energy
flow into the world. We are the conduits. We are not the source.

When we are ruled by ego, WE judge what is good and what is bad. What
is right and what is wrong. When we let go of ego, we let go of
judgment. We leave that for the realm of the Divine. And so, when we
are acting from a place of ego, the wish is that somehow we can tap
into the Divine energy that tells us "this is not what it's
about....it's not all about you!" When those with excessive pride are
able to hear that voice rise within them, then they will get what they
- what we - all deserve. A sense of serenity and of oneness with the
Divine.

And so I thank the Divine Source for helping me to find this message
inside of me. I only hope I will be able to be present and allow this
to happen again when I get to the next verse in this psalm next
Wednesday!

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Posted By Rabbi Steven Nathan to Mindful Torah at 4/28/2010 12:54:00 AM
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